We are going to talk about this directly, because the research is clear that talking openly about suicide does not plant the idea in anyone’s mind. It reduces stigma, opens the door for honest conversations, and saves lives. So let’s talk.
September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month, and this year the conversation is more important than ever. Suicide is the second leading cause of death for people between the ages of 10 and 34 in the United States. In New York State, more people die by suicide each year than by homicide. And in rural regions like ours, where distances are greater, mental health providers are fewer, and a culture of self-reliance can make asking for help feel like weakness, the stakes are particularly high.
The Signs Worth Knowing
Most people who are struggling with suicidal thoughts give some indication before a crisis. The more people in a community who recognize those signs, the more lives can be reached in time.
Watch for: talking about wanting to die or not wanting to be here anymore, giving away possessions, withdrawing from people they were close to, a sudden and unusual calm after a period of depression (which can indicate a decision has been made), increased substance use, expressions of hopelessness or feeling like a burden to others, dramatic mood changes, or changes in sleep patterns.
You do not have to be a clinician to notice these things. You have to be a person who pays attention.
How to Have the Conversation
If you are worried about someone, ask directly. The phrase “are you thinking about suicide” does not put the idea there. It opens a door that the person may have been waiting for someone to open.
Listen without rushing to fix it. Stay with them. Do not leave someone who is in active crisis alone. Help them connect to professional support or bring them to it yourself.
QPR Training, which stands for Question, Persuade, and Refer, is a free, evidence-based gatekeeper training program that teaches everyday people how to recognize the warning signs of suicide and respond appropriately. Free QPR training is available through several providers in our region. Ask your local library, school district, or mental health center about upcoming sessions.
Local Resources in the Finger Lakes and Southern Tier
988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline
Call or text 988 from anywhere in the country, any time of day or night. Free, confidential, and answered by trained counselors. This is the first number to save in your phone and share with every teenager and young adult in your life.
CareFirst NY Crisis Services
3805 Meads Creek Rd., Painted Post, NY | (607) 937-7800 (after hours)
CareFirst serves Chemung, Schuyler, and Steuben counties with crisis intervention and mental health services. Their 24-hour crisis line connects callers to real support around the clock.
Family Services of Chemung County
Crisis line: (607) 442-6900
A mobile crisis response team providing face-to-face or telephone crisis counseling and referral services 24 hours a day, 7 days a week across Chemung County and surrounding areas.
Steuben County Community Mental Health Center
Bath: (607) 664-2255 | Corning: (607) 937-6201 | Hornell: (607) 324-2483
After-hours crisis line: (607) 937-7800. Sliding-scale fees, Medicaid accepted.
Tompkins County Mental Health Services
(607) 274-6200
Outpatient mental health services and crisis support for Tompkins County residents. The county also maintains a warmline for non-emergency emotional support during business hours.
Pathways, Inc.
(607) 937-3200 | pathwaysforyou.org
Serving Steuben, Chemung, and surrounding counties with mental health counseling, crisis support, and wraparound services for individuals and families.
NAMI Finger Lakes
namifingerlakes.org
The National Alliance on Mental Illness Finger Lakes chapter provides education, advocacy, and peer support resources across Tompkins and surrounding counties. Their website maintains an updated resource directory.
Crisis Text Line
Text HOME to 741741 from anywhere in the United States. Free, confidential, available 24 hours a day for anyone in crisis who prefers to communicate by text.
The Trevor Project (LGBTQ+ Youth)
Call 1-866-488-7386, text START to 678-678, or chat at thetrevorproject.org. Available 24 hours a day specifically for LGBTQ+ young people in crisis.
For Families Who Have Experienced Loss
If your family has been touched by suicide loss, the grief is its own specific terrain and it deserves specific support.
Smiling Through the Storms is a support group based in Elmira for anyone who has lost a loved one to suicide, with both in-person and virtual meetings. Contact information is available through NAMI Finger Lakes.
The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (afsp.org) maintains an online resource directory for loss survivors and hosts the annual Out of the Darkness community walks, including events in our region.
What You Can Do
Save 988 in your phone. Share it with your teenagers without explanation or ceremony. Just: “This is a number that matters when you need help. Keep it.”
Ask the people in your life how they are doing. Not as a formality. Actually wait for the answer.
And if you are the one who is struggling right now, please reach out. To 988, to a friend, to a family member, to any of the resources above. You matter to this community in ways you may not fully see right now. Let someone help you see it. 💚