A love letter to all of it: the chaos, the magic, the growing pains, the beautiful mess of raising someone from five to eighteen through every summer in between.
Age 5 — “Everything Is Amazing”
The summer of catching fireflies in a jar and believing they’re magic. Of running through sprinklers with zero self-consciousness. Of asking “why” forty-seven times before lunch and meaning every single one. The world is enormous and entirely good. Protect this as long as you can.
Age 6 — “I’m Pretty Sure I Can Do Anything”
This is the summer of the bike without training wheels, the cannonball off the dock, the first sleepover away from home. There is a specific kind of fearlessness at six that exists nowhere else in life. Encourage all of it.
Age 7 — “Best Friend Summer”
Everything this summer happens with one specific human. They are inseparable. They fight once, dramatically, and make up by dinner. They have inside jokes you’ll never understand. They build something together – a fort, a club, a whole private world. Let them.
Age 8 — “The Summer of Side Quests”
Collections. Projects. A rock that is definitely a fossil. A lemonade stand that runs at a loss but feels like a triumph. A book read in one sitting. An obsession that arrives out of nowhere and takes over the entire household. Age 8 is full of delightful detours.
Age 9 — “Almost”
Almost old enough to stay up. Almost ready for more independence. Almost too cool for some things… but not quite, not yet. A bittersweet summer, this one. Catch the moments before they shift.
Age 10 — “The Sweet Spot”
Old enough to be incredibly interesting company. Young enough to still want to spend time with you. Can carry a real conversation. Still thinks family is cool. Possibly the most underrated age in all of childhood. Bottle it.
Age 11 — “Everything Is A Lot”
The body is doing things. The social world is getting complicated. The emotions arrive without warning and at full volume. Summer is a relief (no school, less pressure) but it’s also when the internal weather really starts shifting. Be patient. Be consistent. Stay close without hovering.
Age 12 — “The Identity Summer”
What kind of music do I like? What kind of person am I? What do I believe? Twelve is when kids start trying on different versions of themselves, sometimes all in the same week. This is not a crisis. This is the work. Give them room to figure it out.
Age 13 — “The Group Chat Summer”
Half the summer is lived on a phone in a bedroom. The other half is lived in an intense, dramatic, hilarious social ecosystem that you are only partially allowed to see. The eye rolls are plentiful. The love is still there. Stay findable.
Age 14 — “Growth Spurt Summer”
Physical. Emotional. Intellectual. Everything at once. The fourteen-year-old who leaves for summer and returns in September is genuinely a different person. Watch for the moments when they let the wall down. Those are the ones that count.
Age 15 — “I’m Fine” (They Are Not Always Fine)
This is the summer to ask twice. “How are you?” “I’m fine.” “No, really… how are you?” Sometimes the second question is where it actually starts. Keep showing up even when you’re being shut out. Especially then.
Age 16 — “The First Taste of Real Freedom”
A job, a license, a later curfew. The intoxicating discovery that you can go somewhere without anyone driving you. Sixteen is a summer of becoming – slightly terrifying for parents, electric for the teenager. Trust the values you’ve been building. They travel with them.
Age 17 — “One Foot Out the Door”
They can see the end of this chapter. Sometimes it makes them cling; sometimes it makes them pull away. Either is normal. The last summer before senior year often has a particular intensity: a need to make it count. Let them feel that without making it about your grief about losing them.
Age 18 — “The Last One Before Everything Changes”
This is the summer people look back on for the rest of their lives. Make it spacious. Make it memorable. Let go, a little, on purpose. The goal was always this – a human being standing on their own two feet, ready to go. You did that. 💙